


The Pearl of Gotham

by Miss_Vile



Series: Nygmobblepot One Shots [8]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Christmas Eve, Christmas Fluff, Dorks in Love, M/M, Mutual Pining, christmas heist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:46:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21803926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Vile/pseuds/Miss_Vile
Summary: If someone had told the Riddler that he was going to be outsmarted tonight, he would have called them crazy. Yet here he was running away from museum security and the GCPD without his prize in hand.
Relationships: Oswald Cobblepot/Edward Nygma
Series: Nygmobblepot One Shots [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1396144
Comments: 5
Kudos: 102





	The Pearl of Gotham

**Author's Note:**

> Another one of my inebriated one-shots I wrote several days ago! I'm balancing a lot of projects lately so it took me a while to post it.
> 
> Several people on the [Nygmobblepot Haven](https://discord.gg/jS5fAHK) discord server requested a Christmas Heist fic and this was what I came up with  
> (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

If someone had told the Riddler that he was going to be outsmarted tonight, he would have called them crazy. Yet here he was running away from museum security and the GCPD without his prize in hand.

Earlier that evening, everything had gone the way it was supposed to. He'd deposited his riddles around town- the first of which being in his old office at the GCPD. He made sure to time it so that Lucius Fox would see it first thing when he came back from his coffee break. The bright green envelope emblazoned with a gold question mark being his recognizable calling card. He estimated that Commissioner Gordon and Foxy would solve his riddles just in time for him to execute his plans and have already made off with his prize.

His eventual goal that evening was to steal the Pearl of Gotham. A fist-sized black pearl with bands of radioactive verdigris caused by toxic sediment left over from No Man's Land more than a decade prior.

As the Riddler picked the lock he could hear police sirens down the street. He chuckled gleefully as he made his way through the staff entrance of the Gotham Museum of Natural Science. The GCPD had four more riddles to solve. By then, Edward would have already left with the pearl and would be enjoying the remainder of his Christmas Eve at the Iceberg Lounge.

Oswald had made quite the mark on the Diamond District. He often hosted lavish Christmas parties with beautifully carved ice sculptures and pygmy penguins wearing festive bow ties waddling around the bar. It became a tradition of theirs to spend the holidays together. After the Lounge closed its doors for the evening, Edward would play the piano and share a few drinks with the man he once claimed was his most bitter enemy.

Edward stopped and stared at his watch. The security guard on duty that night would be leaving the booth to go on his nightly patrol around the museum. Edward would then sneak in, disable the cameras and alarms, and then make his way over to where the pearl was kept. Easy.

The seconds ticked by... Then a full minute. Then five. _Odd._

Edward risked a peek at the man seated at the security desk. From what the Riddler had observed, he was usually right on schedule with his patrols. However, when Edward looked up over the counter, no one was there.

“Crud.” Ed whispered to himself. The security guard must have left the booth early and now Edward had wasted several minutes. He had no idea when the security guard would be returning and he'd hoped he could slink in and out of the museum unnoticed. Now, he wasn't so confident.

He hurried into the booth and ran a magnet over the video recorder. Effectively destroying all of the footage of him breaking into the museum. Before disabling the monitors, he tried locating the security guard. However, the monitors seemed to be on a constant refresh cycle. As if someone had remotely tampered with them.

Frustrated, Edward removed the tape so that the rest of his heist would go unrecorded and then made his way towards the section of the museum that housed the pearl. If he encountered security, he would just have to cut his losses and get rid of him. He'd hoped to avoid killing someone on Christmas Eve. A small mercy in honor of the holiday. But, it looked like Edward was going to have to leave a corpse behind anyway.

He tripped over something in the darkened hallway on his way to the Geology Exhibit. He looked down and realized that it was the security guard. He checked the man's pulse and flinched when he groaned.

“Wha?” The man blinked up at him

“Sorry about this.” Edward sighed and then hit him with the butt of his gun.

Edward spring-boarded to his feet and ran down the hall. He rounded the corner only to be met face to face with _another_ security guard. They apparently doubled security when Edward wasn't looking. A dreadful oversight. An alarm sounded through the museum and Edward was scrambling back the way he came. If he could just get enough distance between him and the other guard, he could wrap around to the other side and still make it to the display case. _Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree_ could be heard playing over the museum radio the entire chase.

He turned the corner and the flashing blue and red lights of the GCPD cars illuminated the walls of the museum corridor.

“We have you surrounded, Riddler.” Jim Gordon's annoying voice boomed over the cacophony of Christmas music, alarms, and sirens.

How had Jim gotten there so fast? It was highly improbable that they had already solved his riddles and even _more_ improbable that they had been able to respond to the museum's security alarm that quickly.

He finally reached his goal and, if his eyes had gotten any wider, they would have fallen out of his head. In place of the pearl was an empty case and a spray-painted question mark on the surface of the glass.

Edward glared at his reflection. It distorted for a moment and then seemed to move on his own. The Riddler was looking back at him from the glossy surface.

“Don't look at me.” his reflection shrugged

Now Edward was _really_ confused.

He could hear the sounds of heavy boots and the static of police radios down the hall. He was already surrounded but, luckily, The Riddler had already mapped out the entirety of the museum. His eidetic memory would serve him well tonight as he navigated the labyrinth of staff corridors. Truth be told, his favorite part of any heist was the thrill of almost getting caught. But even this was cutting it a little too close for comfort. He only had to stop and sprint in the opposite direction a few times but he did manage to make it out of the museum and into a nearby dumpster. Or, as some of the other Rogues lovingly called it, _Hôtel du Riddler._

Once he felt like the coast was clear, he stepped back into the alley and made his way for the Lounge. Oswald would know what to do. Or, at the very least, could shelter him while he figured out what went wrong and hopefully avoid the clutches of Batman once the word got out that the Pearl of Gotham had been stolen.

Jim and Foxy weren't clever enough to have pieced together his puzzles before the appointed time. And they certainly wouldn't have removed the pearl from its place in the exhibit. The only other person who _might_ have caught on to his plan was Batman but taking the pearl for himself and spray-painting a green question mark on the case wasn't his MO either. Echo and Query weren't privy to his plans that evening and were already enjoying themselves at the Lounge.

So, who did that leave? Quite the puzzle indeed. It made Edward's heart bounce around his ribcage.

“Hey, Ed...” his own voice spoke to him through a piece of broken glass in the alley, “What has two eyes but can't see?”

Before Edward could react, something solid hit him on the back of his head. He was out cold before he even hit the ground.

He awoke with a headache. A familiar, dull pain radiating through his skull and down the stiff muscles of his neck. His face was bruised. The extent of the damage was yet to be determined. Though, judging by the swelling over his eye and the feverish warmth on his cheek, he could make an educated guess.

He blinked and took in his surroundings. He recognized the Lounge interior immediately.

“You're finally awake.” the Penguin teased, “What have you managed to get yourself wrapped up in this time?”

“Ow.” Ed rubbed at his head and lifted himself into a sitting position on the velvet couch, “How did I get here?”

“My men found you passed out in an alley. Here.” Oswald handed him a tumbler of whiskey, “To numb the pain in your head. Someone knocked you out and then you landed on your face.”

“Thanks.” Ed sips it. Embarrassed at the state he must be in. This was _not_ how he expected his evening to go.

“So... what happened?” Oswald sat next to his friend.

His office was quite lavish. Ed had spent many nights there recovering after his exploits around Gotham. Oswald had tight security. Even the Batman didn't have access to the Penguin's office. Or, at least not this room which was stashed away behind a trick bookcase. The only way in was to have the code. It hadn't taken Ed long to figure out that it was Martin's birthday and Oswald never questioned how he always managed to get in unnoticed.

Edward covered his face with his hands and groaned. Then he told his friend everything. How he had planned a heist. How everything had spiraled out of control and went wrong. How he still didn't know who had outmaneuvered him. How he lost the prize.

“Oh, you mean this?” Oswald pulled the pearl out of his pocket.

Edward gasped, “YOU!”

“Me.” Oswald chuckled, rolling the pearl in the palm of his gloved hand.

“But, how did-”

“-You left your notes on the desk, you big idiot.” Oswald pointed to the corner of his office that had slowly become Ed's own makeshift den.

“But I only left the riddles behind. All of the answers were up here.” Edward grinned and tapped a finger to his temple.

“Guess they weren't very good riddles if I could solve them so easily.” Oswald rolled his eyes and sipped his whiskey

“Those riddles were perfect.” Edward beamed. Happy that his evening was looking up and that he didn't have to deal with the Batman after all. At least not right now, “How did you sneak past the museum's security?”

“I didn't. I hired Selina to steal the pearl once I knew that was what you were after.”

“Were you also the one who tipped off the GCPD?”

“I _might_ have expedited their arrival, yes. I thought it would make the chase more fun for you.”

“You never cease to amaze me, Oswald.” Edward smiled

Oswald's blush slowly spread to his ears. This scene was beginning to feel a little too familiar. Oswald nursing another one of Ed's injuries. The two of them by the fire. Words of admiration spoken between them. Even more left unspoken and dangling in the air.

“I can see why you wanted it.” Oswald turned the pearl around in his hands, “Quite an alarming shade of green.”

“That's not why I wanted it.” Edward smiled, taking the pearl into his own hand and turning it in the light. The inky black surface shone a bright, iridescent purple.

“Purple and green really do complement one another.” Oswald smiled

“That they do.” Edward smiled in return, “I planned on gifting this to someone _very_ special.”

Oswald swallowed down his jealousy. He was used to it by now. He'd seen Edward waltz around the Lounge with a woman on each arm. Giggling at his riddles and batting their lashes at him. They never saw him though. Only the Rogue that they paid to see when they dared to enter the infamous Iceberg Lounge.

“They're lucky to have someone like you admire them so much that you would risk getting pummeled by the Batman on Christmas Eve.”

“I believe _I_ am the lucky one, in this instance.” Edward sighed, “I don't deserve to have them in my life but, for some reason, they keep me around. Perhaps for their own amusement but I wouldn't have it any other way.”

The bell chimed at midnight.

“Merry Christmas, Oswald.” Edward smiled and placed the pearl back into Oswald's hand. Oswald looked at him in befuddlement before realizing that _he_ was the intended recipient.

“For me?” the Penguin gasped

“Of course.” Edward laughed, “Who else would I be talking about?”

“You mean to tell me that I spent the entirety of my Christmas Eve stalking you through alleys and stealing my own present?”

Edward laughed, “Did you enjoy your evening, at least?”

“I suppose I did.” Oswald chuckled and then sighed, “But I didn't get you anything.”

“Oh, I don't know about that.” Edward laughed, “You gave me my own puzzle to solve this evening.”

“Yeah, and a black eye.” Oswald handed him an ice cube to place over the bruise, “Sorry about that. I didn't give Selina specific enough instructions when I told her to bring you here.”

“Apology accepted.” Edward took Oswald by the hand. He kissed his friend on the knuckles and smirked when he saw how it made him blush. It was possibly a cruel gesture given their history, but Edward would make up for it eventually. Oswald would know how he felt when the time was right. But, until then, he would keep his distance. Sort of, “Now, I do believe it has been our tradition to spend Christmas downstairs by the piano. Will you be joining me?”

“Yes. This year and hopefully many more to come, old friend.”

And so they did. For many, many years.

**Author's Note:**

> In other news: I'm almost done with the next chapter of [The Story of Edward Nashton's Youth](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21542419/chapters/51354640)! I had a family emergency come up so I haven't finished editing it. I'm hoping to have it ready sometime next week.


End file.
